Sources of Rage

Diligent readers of the Tassava Family Blogs know that our youngest has been having a bad time with sleeping lately. “Lately” means “since forever, or at least spring.” In addition to epic screaming fits at bedtime (tonight was a relatively short 30-some minutes), this Time of Troubles includes her waking frequently all night, anywhere from two or three times on a “good” night to a dozen times on a %#&#)%* bad night. To be honest, this is – for me – the second-worst period of my combined six-and-a-half years of parenting; only Julia’s own horrific sleep troubles as an infant were worse.

I’m trying – mostly failing, but still trying – to be properly zen about this ordeal, to keep in mind that this phase is probably at least twice as hard on Genevieve, what with the nighttime screaming fits and the daytime tiredness, as it is on me. As a grown-up, I can get by on six hours of disrupted sleep, so long as I can consume powerful legal stimulants.

As part of an effort to to accept the things I cannot change or at least to act like a fracking adult about them, I submit this partial list (one item for every month of life!) of

Some Nocturnal Things That Provoke Genevieve:

1. Raw toddler surliness.
2. Not getting an additional bedtime story.
3. My singing her bedtime songs too loudly or too softly.
4. My singing her bedtime songs too quickly, or too slowly.
5. My leaving the room after saying “good night.”
6. The infernal way the door clicks when I leave the room after saying “good night.”
7. My not coming back in after saying “good night.”
8. My not saying “good night” after the second visit.
9. Having too many, too few, or the wrong blankets on her.
10. Getting a foot stuck in the crib rails while kicking off the blankets.
11. Getting cold after kicking off her blankets.
12. Getting hot after not kicking off her blankets.
13. Being perfectly comfortable except for having her blankets either on or off.
14. Having the wrong socks on.
15. Having the right socks off.
16. Being asked to wear certain jammies, not of her choosing.
17. Being asked to wear a nice warm sleeper, of any sort.
18. Losing her “PJ Bear” friend.
19. Losing her blanket.
20. Having her bear and/or her blanket, but holding them in the wrong hands.
21. Being crowded by the other stuffed animals in her crib.
22. Not being crowded by the other stuffed animals in her crib.
23. Night terrors.
24. Not having a parent in the room.
25. Having the wrong parent in the room.
26. Having both parents in the room.
27. Having her sister in the other room.
28. Having her sister in the room, asleep.