If your day has to have a low point, it's good to get it out of the way early. In my case today, the nadir came at about 8:30 a.m., when my doctor, peering into my right eye with an ultraviolet light, said, "Oh, boy. That's a big one." He was describing the scratch on my cornea which I had apparently inflicted on Sunday night.
A scratched cornea seems like something much more exotic than it turns out to be: piercing pain, more tears than a four-year-old not getting her way, Frankenstein's bloodshot eyeball, a scorching headache, and a teensy-tiny dropper of Bausch & Lomb "ocular antibiotics," to be administered four times a day for 5-7 days.