The Worm in the Apple

Setting up this new MacBook last night was a breeze; by ten o'clock I was using a faster, higher, stronger machine that had all the same files and apps as my old one. Tonight, I hit the worm in the Apple, though: Microsoft products. My first attempt to launch Excel - which I own, having bought the Office suite back in the day - blew up and now the nagware is trying to get me to buy and download Office for Mac 2004. What year is it?

Forecast: Significant blowing and drifting, with the possibility of heavy accumulation in rural areas.