Yuck You Very Much, or, Modern Air Travel

The best moment of this week’s trip to D.C. came early, as I stood at a gate at MSP, waiting to see if I’d move from the standby list onto the plane. I was #4 on the list, then #3 when one guy took himself off, then #2 when another guy got a spot in first class, then #1 with two ticketed passengers still missing.

After roughly a zillion intercom calls, the gate agents said they’d have a spot for me. “Just a second, though. We have to find you a seat.”

One turned to the other: “What seat is the last boarder in? He’s eligible for an upgrade.” The other checked the passenger list: “He’s in 22-C.”

The first one curled her nose dramatically. “Yuck. Worst seat on the plane. Move him up!”

She turned to me, smiling brightly. “We have you in 22-C! Enjoy the flight!”

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