Evidence that Vivi Is An Unfit Mother

She often picks up her baby (doll) by grabbing the back of her shirt, with two hands around her neck, or by the foot.
When feeding the baby, she often “misses” the baby’s mouth and pokes the baby in the eye, nose, or forehead with the spoon, bottle, or bit of food.
She frequently comforts the baby by picking it up, cooing softly in her ear, and then shrieking loudly and shaking the baby.
She makes little or no effort to communicate clearly, preferring instead a bizarre pidgin of poorly enunciated words, letters, and numbers, along with a healthy number of regular old yells, grunts, and shrieks (see (3) above).
When it’s time for the baby’s nap, she closes her eyes by manually pressing the eyelids shut.
She often uses a beat-up toy grocery cart as a stroller, sometimes without first removing the food in it.
Nobody’s ever seen her change a diaper.
She herself is still wearing diapers.
She frequently covers the baby’s head with her swaddling blanket.
When she tires of playing with her, she drops the doll face-first on the floor.

Tags: girls

1 Jordan // Aug 30, 2008 at 6:51 pm

Babies having babies. It’s a real problem in this country. Sigh.
2 Donna // Sep 9, 2008 at 3:06 am

Dude, this was just too funny.

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